Wedding Gift Etiquette And Gift Guide

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On the JJ Barnes Blog, as wedding season arrives, I share the wedding gift etiquette you need to know, and gift ideas so you can go in prepared.

Wedding season is upon us, a time of celebration, joy, and…perhaps a touch of gift-giving anxiety? We’ve all been there, staring at that invitation and wondering: cash or gift? Registry or rogue pick? Worry no more! This blog post is your one-stop shop for navigating wedding gift etiquette and finding the perfect present for the happy couple.

With the help of Matt Jones, CEO of WonderDays, I’ll break down the essential dos and don’ts of wedding gifting, from deciphering a registry to navigating cash contributions. But that’s not all! Feeling a little uninspired by the registry options? Don’t fret! I’ve also compiled a gift idea list so you can show up to the wedding celebration with a present that truly reflects your thoughtfulness.

1. Know Your Relationship

The first rule of wedding gifting etiquette is to consider your relationship with the couple. Are they close friends or distant relatives? The nature of your connection should dictate the level of thought and investment you put into their gift.

Here’s a general guideline to get you started:

Close Friends and Family: These are the folks you know well and likely share a deeper bond with. You can get a little more personal with your gift, splurging on a high-quality item from their registry or selecting something truly unique that reflects their shared interests. Think personalized experiences (cooking class, weekend getaway), high-end kitchenware they’ve been eyeing, or a piece of art that complements their style.

Acquaintances and Colleagues: For these connections, a thoughtful gift from their registry is always a safe bet. It shows you put in the effort to find something they’d appreciate. However, if you want to add a touch of personalization, consider a small, heartfelt note expressing your congratulations or a gift basket filled with gourmet treats or spa products.

Distant Relatives and Plus Ones: In these cases, a contribution to their cash registry or a gift card to a popular home goods store is perfectly acceptable. It allows them the flexibility to choose something they truly need or desire.

Personalization is key. Tailoring the gift to reflect your relationship shows sincerity and thoughtfulness.

-Matt Jones

2. Stick to the Registry (Mostly)

While it’s tempting to stray from the registry in pursuit of a unique or extravagant gift, it’s generally best to adhere to the couple’s wishes. Couples spend time carefully crafting their registry to reflect their current lifestyle and future aspirations. It includes items they genuinely need or desire for their new home together. Choosing from the registry ensures your gift is something they’ll truly use and appreciate.

There are ways to personalize your gift even when sticking to the registry!

Include a heartfelt card: A handwritten note expressing your congratulations and well wishes adds a personal touch that any couple will appreciate.

Upgrade an item: If the budget allows, consider upgrading a registry item to a higher quality version. For example, if a basic toaster is on the list, you could choose a high-end model.

Add a gift basket: Pair a registry item with a complementary gift basket. For example, if they register for a cheese board, add a basket filled with gourmet cheeses and crackers.

Registries are a roadmap to the couple’s desires. However, if you have a deeply personal or sentimental gift in mind, ensure it complements rather than contradicts their registry choices.

-Matt Jones

3. Budget Wisely

Determining how much to spend on a wedding gift can be tricky. Consider your budget in relation to your relationship with the couple. Start by taking a realistic look at your own financial situation. Don’t feel pressured to break the bank just for a wedding gift. Choose an amount that feels comfortable and won’t strain your budget.

It’s not about the monetary value of the gift, but the thought and effort put into selecting it. A well-chosen gift, regardless of price, speaks volumes. For pricier items on the registry, pooling resources with other guests is a fantastic option.

Ultimately, the most important thing is to choose a gift that comes from the heart and shows the couple you care about celebrating their special day. A thoughtful note expressing your congratulations and best wishes can elevate even a modest gift.

4. Group Gifting Etiquette

In the age of group gifting, coordinating with others to purchase a larger, more extravagant gift has become commonplace. Many couples register for big-ticket items like high-end kitchen appliances, luxurious furniture pieces, or even honeymoon experiences. Group gifting makes these aspirations achievable, allowing them to receive the items they truly need or desire without placing a burden on individual guests.

Here are some tips for a successful group gifting experience:

Choose a Responsible Organizer: One person should volunteer to coordinate the group gift. This person can create a communication channel (email thread, group chat) to keep everyone informed.

Set a Clear Budget and Goal: Determine the total cost of the desired gift and set a realistic budget for each participant.

Utilize Registry Tools: Take advantage of the group gifting functionalities offered by many online registries. This allows for easy tracking and ensures everyone contributes to the chosen item.

Communicate Effectively: Keep the group updated on the progress and ensure everyone feels included.

Communication is key. Ensure everyone is on the same page regarding the budget and gift choice to avoid any misunderstandings or discrepancies.

-Matt Jones

5. Timing is Everything

Don’t procrastinate when it comes to wedding gifts. Aim to purchase or send your gift well in advance of the wedding date. Ideally, gifts should be sent before the wedding or within a few weeks afterward. This ensures the couple can fully enjoy and appreciate your gesture without the chaos of the wedding day.

Many online retailers offer gift wrapping and direct shipping options. Take advantage of these services to ensure your gift arrives beautifully presented and directly to the couple, saving you time and effort.

6. Consider Their Lifestyle

When selecting a wedding gift, take the couple’s lifestyle into account. Are they avid travellers, aspiring chefs, or homebodies? By personalizing your selection based on their hobbies, passions, and future plans, you can choose a gift that goes beyond the generic and becomes something they’ll truly treasure.

Ideas for choosing gifts based on lifestyle:

The Globetrotters: For the couple who loves to travel, consider gifts that enhance their adventures. Think luggage sets, travel journals, noise-cancelling headphones, or a contribution to their honeymoon fund. You could even gift them a unique experience like a weekend getaway or a hot air balloon ride.

The Culinary Creators: If the couple enjoys cooking and entertaining, a gift that elevates their kitchen is a great choice. High-quality knives, a fancy cookbook stand, a personalized cutting board, or a set of high-end cookware would all be appreciated.

The Homebodies: For couples who love cozy nights in, focus on gifts that create a comfortable and inviting atmosphere. A luxurious throw blanket, a set of aromatherapy candles, a comfy hammock for the backyard, or a subscription to a streaming service would all be well-received.

The Entertaining Enthusiasts: For couples who love hosting gatherings, consider gifts that enhance their entertaining repertoire. A beautiful serving platter, a set of unique cocktail glasses, a wine chiller, or a portable speaker would all be perfect options.

The Fitness Fanatics: For the health-conscious couple, a gift that supports their active lifestyle is a great pick. Fitness trackers, a yoga mat and block set, a couple’s gym membership, or a subscription to a healthy meal delivery service would all show you understand their passion.

A thoughtful gift enhances the couple’s life together. Consider practicality, longevity, and how the gift aligns with their interests and hobbies.

-Matt Jones

7. Handwritten Notes Matter

At a time when most of our communication is digital, a handwritten note accompanying your gift carries significant weight. A heartfelt message adds a personal touch and demonstrates your genuine affection for the couple. It’s a timeless gesture that will be cherished long after the wedding day.

What to Include in Your Note:

Warm Congratulations: Express your heartfelt congratulations and best wishes for their future together.

A Personal Touch: Go beyond generic greetings. Reference a funny memory you share with the couple, express your excitement for their new chapter, or share a piece of advice (if appropriate).

Gratitude for Their Invitation: Let them know you appreciate being included in their special day.

Wedding Gift Ideas

Personalised Cheese Board Set

A cheese board isn’t a one-time use item. It becomes a staple for entertaining, hosting wine nights, or simply enjoying a cozy night in. Personalization takes it a step further, transforming it from a functional board to a cherished heirloom. Imagine them using it for years to come, the engraving reminding them of your thoughtful gift and the joy of their special day.

To truly take your gift to the next level, consider including a selection of gourmet cheeses or artisanal crackers alongside the personalized board. This creates a complete cheese-lover’s package they can enjoy right away!

Mr And Mrs Champagne Flutes

Champagne flutes are inherently linked to special occasions and celebrations. Gifting a pair engraved with “Mr. and Mrs.” personalizes them for the couple’s big day and becomes a symbol of their ongoing celebration of marriage. They’ll be perfect for toasts on anniversaries, birthdays, or simply enjoying a glass of bubbly together.

Elevate the gift by including a beautiful champagne bucket alongside the flutes. This creates a complete set they can use for every celebratory toast.

Mr and Mrs Luggage Tags and Passport Holder Set

If the couple enjoys travel and appreciates a touch of tradition, a personalized Mr and Mrs luggage tags and passport holder set can be a lovely and practical way to show you care about their future adventures together. The luggage tags ensure their belongings are easily identifiable, while the passport holders offer stylish protection for their travel documents.

As they travel together, explore new destinations, and embark on adventures, these personalized tags and passport holders will be a constant reminder of their love and commitment.

Honeymoon Sand Keepsake Jar

This isn’t just a jar; it’s a tangible memory bank. The couple can fill it with sand from their honeymoon beach, creating a sensory reminder of their idyllic getaway. Every time they see the honeymoon sand keepsake jar, they’ll be transported back to those sun-soaked days, reliving the joy and romance of their honeymoon.

Displayed on a shelf or mantlepiece, it serves as a conversation starter, prompting them to share stories and reminisce about their honeymoon with friends and family.

Hand Casting Kit

This gift goes beyond the ordinary. By casting their hands together, the couple creates a physical representation of their bond and commitment. It’s a fun and lighthearted experience that allows them to capture a moment in time, literally hand-in-hand. It injects a touch of creativity and joy into their wedding celebration.

The finished hand cast becomes a cherished keepsake they can display in their home. Every time they see it, they’ll be reminded of their wedding day and of their love, intertwined and forever connected.

Yankee Candle Wedding Day Set

Candles are synonymous with creating a warm and inviting atmosphere. A Wedding Day Candle Set, with its soft, floral scent, is perfect for setting the mood for a romantic evening in. The couple can light the candles for a cozy dinner, a relaxing bath, or simply to enjoy some quiet time together. While it has a special connection to their wedding, the candles can be enjoyed long after the big day.

Elevate the gift by including a beautiful, personalized candle holder. This adds a touch of elegance and ensures the set becomes a cherished decorative item in their home.

Insights from the Expert: Matt’s Tips

When selecting wedding gifts, Matt encourages looking beyond mere material possessions. Consider experiences, personalised keepsakes, or charitable donations that align with the couple’s values. Stressing quality over quantity, Matt believes a well-crafted, meaningful gift holds enduring significance, irrespective of its price.

Moreover, Matt advocates for gifts that contribute to the couple’s future together. Invest in items that enrich their shared life journey, whether it’s a cherished piece of artwork for their home, or a subscription to simplify their busy schedules.

Wedding gifting etiquette may seem daunting, Matt’s insights provide invaluable guidance. Armed with these principles, one can approach the task with confidence and grace, recognizing that the essence of gift-giving lies in the love, thoughtfulness, and personal connection behind each gesture.

About WonderDays

WonderDays infuses every day with wonder by offering the gift of unforgettable experiences. With nearly 30 years of expertise in the unique experience days space, they are more than just a team – they’re a family dedicated to creating moments that last a lifetime. Their goal is to help everyone escape the mundane and craft memories that endure with a WonderDays experience gift. 

Matt Jones is an adventure enthusiast and the CEO of WonderDays.

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